By Carol Levy, Columnist

I just got my medical marijuana ID card.

I never tried marijuana as a teen. The one time someone gave me a sample of their medical marijuana, it made me feel terrible, as though I had taken a large dose of opioid medication -- fuzzy mouthed and cloudy brained.

It made me leery, but once it became legal in Pennsylvania there was no way I would not try it.

First thing you have to do is find a state certified doctor. There are only a few, so you are pretty much stuck with whomever is nearby. Before I could see the doctor, I had to give a urine sample. I have never been asked before to do this. All patients are required to – so they can weed out those who may be abusers.

That does not make it any less uncomfortable. I felt, as many do, as though I had been convicted of something and now had to prove my innocence.

The expense seems to be created to make it very hard to access. I am on a fixed disability income. The first visit with the doctor cost $125. This fee was required at the time of the appointment. The doctor told me that I would have to come in once a month for the first six months of use. This would cost $50 per visit, again payable at the time of the appointment.

Next you must send in $50 to get the state ID card.

Once that arrived, I had to find a dispensary. There was one about a half an hour from my home.  I called first to make sure they were open. They were very nice, but the feeling of doing something untoward was hard to ignore. I watch Law and Order. The drug dealers invariable say they have “product.”

“Are you open yet?” I asked the receptionist at the dispensary. “Yes. But we are out of product at this time.” Product? But this is supposed to be a legitimate medical medication, not something clandestine.

Product? But this is supposed to be a legitimate medical medication, not something clandestine.

I went as soon as they had “product.” When I arrived, another person was waiting outside at the entrance, where there was a security guard. He looked at me and said, “Sorry you have to wait outside. We're only allowed to let one person in at a time.”

A security guard? I get that. You never know who might try to worm their way in. But I had the ID card. Why did we have to wait outside before each person was cleared?

Inside was lovely. Nice personnel, a waterfall, plants, real wood tables, coffee, tea and cookies waiting for us on a sideboard. It almost puts you off balance. A security guard at the door. Only one customer inside a time. Is something nefarious going on? But once inside it is warm, embracing and inviting.

I was escorted to a private room, where I spoke with the dispensary pharmacist. She explained how the medication works and what would be best for me, at least to start with. After the consultation I went back to the dispensary room.

The cost was less than I expected. Again, the fee was required at the time of purchase. It was cash only, no checks and no credit cards. Just like with a drug dealer. Apparently, banks are not able to accept checks or credit card charges because of the federal prohibition against marijuana.

Aside from feeling like I was doing something wrong, because of the urine test, security guard, “product” and cash up front, I am glad I tried it. The product I bought has not helped my pain, but the good thing is there are other concentrates and combinations I can try.

It is ironic that there is this war on opioids, yet marijuana remains a Schedule I controlled substance, making it very hard for researchers to get permission to study it. Studies that are available show it helps many disorders, including some forms of chronic pain  If the government truly wanted to help us get off opioids, they should make marijuana readily available for study and for patients..

Then, for many of us, there would be one more avenue of hope.

Carol Jay Levy has lived with trigeminal neuralgia, a chronic facial pain disorder, for over 30 years. She is the author of “A Pained Life, A Chronic Pain Journey.” Carol is the moderator of the Facebook support group “Women in Pain Awareness.” Her blog “The Pained Life” can be found here.

The information in this column should not be considered as professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. It is for informational purposes only and represent the author’s opinions alone. It does not inherently express or reflect the views, opinions and/or positions of Pain News Network.